Today’s post is not for the faint hearted. But if you’re about to give birth for the first time then I recommend you read on.
Pushing. Yes we are getting to it now. You are going to have to push. But what no-one ever tells you is that you are going to have to perform long sustained pushes that last the entirety of your contraction. Contractions last for about a minute when it is all getting very serious. So that’s pushing, as hard as you can for over a minute, every couple of minutes (or less when it’s all getting serious) for quite a long time. (Hours anyone?)
Ok you say, that doesn’t seem too bad. (Well it seems pretty bad actually, but hey ho!)
Have you ever tried holding your breath for a minute? I bet you can’t. It’s. A. Long. Time.
Most people hold their breath when pushing, really pushing as hard as they can through the bottom end…
So to perform a sustained push during labour you need to be able to breathe whilst sustaining your push.
That’s what you have to practice. On the loo. When you’re doing a number two.
Believe me. The whole labour thing will go a little easier.
Midwifes will not be yelling DONT STOP! DONT STOP! DONT STOP! KEEP PUSHING! SIMONE! KEEP PUSHING!
And you won’t be screaming I CAN’T! I CAN’T Because I have to F*****G BREATHE YOU B****.
Yes, much apologising after labour.
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